Linger

"And Jesus answered and said unto her, Martha, Martha, thou art careful and troubled about many things: But one thing is needful: and Mary hath chosen that good part, which shall not be taken away from her." (Luke 10:41-42)

As the minutes past 6 o' clock tick by, Peter pushes an Asian vegetable medley back and forth on his white IKEA plate, occasionally taking a bite of broccoli or carrots, and frequently becoming lost in the depths of his own imagination. I assume a battle is happening in that mysterious place, as his war noises are unmistakable and hand gestures could be nothing but. 

I sit across our large, rustic table from him, each the only remaining member on our respective benches. Productivity pulls at me, willing me to get up, to clear the table, wash the dishes, sweep the floor, start a load in the wash, get a jump on bedtime routines. I resist. I have a slow-life goal: I will be the last to leave the table at each meal; I will linger. 

linger: "to stay in a place longer than necessary because of a reluctance to leave" - Oxford Languages 

I pull out some white printer paper, a sketch pencil and a sparkly pencil with a blunt tip but excellent eraser. The Friend magazine lies open from our dinner devotional, and I use an image of a young boy for inspiration as I sketch. When my hands are busy it becomes easier to resist the pull of productivity; it becomes easier to sit in silence or to let conversation flow. 

A question comes to me: "How did it go today at the library? Did you find everything on your list?" 

A response: " Yeah! I found way more than my list. My backpack was so heavy!" 

We meander through this topic as Peter finishes his vegetables and pulls a raspberry white chocolate ice cream from the freezer to scoop atop his warm snickerdoodle. I'll have my cookie instead with the tasty tea my herbalist neighbor brought by to help with miscarriage healing. It smells of chamomile and I add two sticks of honey for sweetness. 

Others come and go: for a cookie, for ice cream, for conversation, for a bit of drawing beside Mom. By the time we lick the crumbs from our fingers and zip the markers in their storage bag once more, I am full - full of love for these children of God who share my home, full of a deeper understanding of what is in their hearts and on their minds, full of the peace that comes with still relaxation. 

Oh yes, and full of good, nourishing food, as well. 

Tricks that Help Me Linger Longer: 

• Candlelight: For some unknowable reason, lighting a candle at the beginning of a meal reminds me that it is time to slow down, to take time, to linger. 
• Instrumental Music: A little soft music in the background takes the pressure off the need for constant conversation to fill the silence. My favorite instrumental artist currently is Paul Cardall. 
• Dessert: If you want everyone to linger longer at the table, dessert is a sure bet. The snickerdoodles we ate tonight were made from dough out of the fridge, saved from a previous day, but baked fresh this evening. 
• Handiwork: Drawing takes my mind off of all the other things I "should" be doing and allows my focus to remain present with the people I love. I imagine needlework or knitting would have the same effect, although I am not experienced in either. 
• Curiosity: Dare to wonder, to delve deep, to drink in the experiences from the days of another. Ask questions and then ask more. Exploring the life of someone else never gets old.